The best way to go through this chapter is to read it while
simultaneously feeling the impact in the body.
As long as your brain
and body are together in reading, it means that you are resonating
with the essence of the text.
If your body looses interest in reading it means the text is not
at present "meant" for you. It is a question of
resonance. You might be a far more spiritually advanced Soul than I am
and still not understand a word of what is written here!
The largest & most important sense organ – the skin
Of all the five senses the sense of feeling is the most
fundamental in the process of meditation.
At least this I my personal experience.
Amplification of feeling-sensations through awareness
Right now… Just feel the many different sensations from your skin:
feel your toes, feet’s, legs, hands … feel also how the clothes
has contact to your skin. Maybe you can even feel the sensation of
your hair on the head and the feeling of your face in contact with
the surrounding air. When you direct your innocent awareness to
these simple facts of sensation, you will feel an immediately
amplification of these sensations.
This spontaneous amplification is tremendous important.
A short preliminary definition of the difference between awareness and
consciousness
At the same time we note that we are able to direct our awareness
to different locations - contrary to our consciousness. In this
context our definition of consciousness is that it is
essentially abstract and non-locate-able in time and space.
Consciousness is also not dependant of sensations. Awareness is basically rooted in feeling sensations and is
direct-able.
Now let us aware our hands
The brain has reserved a lot of processor power for the hands. Accordingly it will be the best place to sense this phenomenon of sense-amplification. When you start feeling your hands in this simple
non-intellectual aha-awareness they will start tingling or
feeling hot or heavy…
This is the first step into the exploration of things hidden
behind the curtain of the obvious.
Now feel - deliberately I don't use the word "look" -
deeper into this phenomenon - right in this moment it is
taking place in your hands. You will now be able to
innerstand several small things so close
to you that your eyes have not been able to see them. Nevertheless
these small things have been with you your whole life!
And behind the curtain of the obvious you have been their
servant!
The two directions of feeling sensations
So the first innerstanding of the obvious is that your
sense of feeling is dual. They can be divided into:
Outer skin sensations
&
Inner feeling sensations
from the core of the body
• Outer skin sensations
I guess we are all quite intellectually aware of our body's outer skin
sensations. But let us make a little experiment.
When you, starting with your outer skin-sensation, aha-feel
your hands, then arms etc. you will most
probably discover that the previous mentioned sense-amplification
after some time is taking you away from the surface of the skin
and deeper into the body.
•
Feeling sensations from the inside of the
body
So now we are beginning our journey into the inner body.
Astonishing is the fact that the sensations we receive from the
inner core of our body somehow is a very aware fact and at the
same time is utterly shrouded in unawareness.
So here our
exploration into the obvious begins. We have metaphorically spoken to start with rediscovering that 1
plus 1 equals 2.
Physical pain
One type of sensations we are able to receive from the inner body
is the sensation of physical pain. Physical pain is in general a
non-dual sensation. But under certain circumstances physical pain
can morph into what could be called ecstatic sensations.
Sexual sensations
The sexual sensations are mono-sensations like the pain
sensations. But similar to the pain sensations they
can transform into the same area of ecstatic sensations. The
sexual sensations are
furthermore able to bridge and connect the physical with the
emotional sensations.
Emotional sensations
Another type of sensations arises from from here. We call them
feelings or emotions. They are somehow close relatives to pain,
but in opposition to the physical pain-feelings they are dual in
nature in the sense that they can move into what is called
feelings of pleasure. Apart from pain-pleasure
feelings there are love-hate, happiness-sadness,
hope-despair, fear-courage feelings and all imaginable almost symphonic
variations over these main themes.
When we describe these
sensations we use the word: feel, a word we also use in our
description of the outer skin sensations. We say
I feel happy,
and I feel sad. We also say I feel pain or I
feel sexually aroused.
Another interesting fact is that we don't describe these actual
happenings as the actually are: as phenomenon's taking place in
our inner body. We already have abstract ready made words that in
itself already are interpretations of the phenomenon's. These
ready made word-concepts are
words like sad, happy, angry, etc.
DARK MATTER SENSATIONS
Yet a fourth kind of feeling-sensations arise from the body core.
We could call them dark matter sensations
since they somehow are utmost present, yet on the other hand we
have no language to describe them.
They are in this context the most important sensations to aware.
Lets have a deeper dive into the dark matter sensations.
The location of dark matter sensations
Close your eyes for a short moment after reading the next
lines. Take a deep breath - deep breathing especially through the
mouth makes it easier for the awareness to come in contact with
the lower part of the body core. With closed eyes we can now go "hunting" for the dark
matter sensations. Scan your inner body with your feeling
awareness from the anus up to the throat. Between these poles
there is a good possibility that you will be able to aware the dark matter
energies - especially the stomach area is important.
The stomach contains the most important brain you have.
This brain rules your
life!
Another hot spot
for dark matter energies is hidden in the hands (and feet). But let us start with an
inner-body-exploration of the anus. You have to aha-feel
with your inner awareness. Your basic awareness will most
certainly
like previous mentioned
amplify your sensation of the area. You will probably feel
that "something" is going on there.
If you cannot feel anything now, you should stop reading and
instead use energy and time to say hello to
your body. Embrace it... It could be the beginning of a life long
friendship!
There are no precise words for this ... jellyfish
Maybe we could
describe this "something" as a kind of tingling, burning or nervous
electrical energy.
Most
probably it will not be pleasant to feel, but it is not what you
could call pain. Now go from the anus to the area of the lower
stomach. Again you will feel all kinds of different tingling,
nervous electrical energy patterns dance. The word "dance" is here used to highlight the fact that these
energy patterns are not static. They are dynamic and they often
move in very slow movements like a sea-flower moved by tidal waves. Often the
look-feel of these dark
matter patterns almost looks like flowers or trees in the way they
unfold in the inner-body universe. These tingling,
nervous electrical energy patterns mostly have tentacles
- either within the
the core of the body and/or tentacles going
out in the arms and legs. You can aware them as a kind of jellyfish with its
main body in the lower stomach
area. You might also feel these energy-patterns as isolated
tentacles.
These tentacles might even sometimes feel like stinging or
burning.
Since our language somehow has been "banned" from these areas of
sensation it is very difficult to find suitable metaphors. So all
the metaphor mentioned here should be apprehended in the broadest
way possible.
That is partly also why I have chosen the jellyfish as a metaphor:
it is in itself an almost abstract animal containing 98% water.
You could also aware these energy-sensations as abstract
3-dimensional forms. It can be quite a sport to locate these
abstract forms as they rise and fall in infinite variations.
If your experience can't be contained in these metaphors
you are welcome to find your own suitable analogue. The most
important thing is that we can agree on that "something" is going
on there.
Dark matter sensations are the building stones from which all
emotions are created.
When you start to aware the tiny tingling, burning or nervous
electrical energy in your body you will notice that
you in fact have been carrying a universe of complex sensations in
you all the time! The
most basic of all meditation techniques is to always aha-feel
these sensations. When you have made it a way of living
always to aha-aware these sensations you will notice that
all your feelings basically are rooted in the secret
life of the dark matter energies - it is only a question of
the intensity before these sensations are channeled
into the ready made expression-containers we call love, joy, fear,
hate etc.
Actually all feeling sensations a human can aware are created out
of the dark matter sensations. They are the atomic particles of
all feeling-material.
Dark matter evolves into physical feelings and then from there
into emotional feelings.
Higher spiritual feelings
Apart from the more "primitive" lower stomach-area there are rainbows of other
utterly amazing energy-phenomenon's in the upper body core. These
spiritual feelings
in general take place from the solar
plexus to the top of the head. They are born as a kind of orgasmic
ecstasy in the area between pain and pleasure energies.
To enjoy these beautiful feeling-flowers along the spiritual
roadside is something I wish will happen in your life
too dear reader!
But the area from the anus to solar plexus is the most
interesting and important in this context because:
•
It is the most difficult and painful area for
the human consciousness to aware.
• It is the solid
foundation on which the higher spiritual feelings are created.
Often people have
premature
glimpses of higher spiritual feelings before they have a
genuine contact with their jellyfish-body. It is not
advisable for a seeker to go for these glimpses directly. To
aware the jellyfish-body is similar to learning to
crawl before you start walking
Energy-sensations in the lower parts of the body-core are the
most un-consciousness
It is basically not a natural thing for the human nature directly
to aware dark matter sensations and particular not in the anus,
stomach and solar plexus areas. It is indeed very strange since
these energies create the most intense storms in the inner body
landscape. But we are not programmed to aware them directly -
ether through language or by
other means of conscious activity. On the contrary these storms
are programmed to control us. We are always standing with our back
to this tiger. And when it attacks we are just standing and
screaming without really knowing what has attacked us. Actually
this is just another way of
expressing the obvious fact that we as human beings are controlled
by our body-sensations and emotions. But no-body in a state of
sensation-emotional storm says: I feel a burning and unpleasant
sensation in my stomach and solar-plexus - Instead we will
say: I am angry ... with you! The only exception
as far as I know is the expression:
I got butterflies in my stomach.
But have you ever really tried with full attention to
aware how fear "look-feels" as it takes place as an energy storm
in your body?
Right in these days (Feb 06)
millions of Moslems all over the world feel angry and offended due
to some satiric drawings of The Prophet Muhammad. They were
published by a Danish news paper in an immature attempt to put
freedom of speech before respect for other peoples feelings. But
this is not the point in this context. Million of people here are
enraged in anger. But in fact they should say: I feel unease in
my body. When I heard about these drawings I got a strong pain-like
feeling in my stomach and my solar plexus. This sensation is too
intense to contain. I must do some action against the drawings of
Mohamed in order to get rid of these unbearable sensations.
So now you know... You are a puppet attached to a
jellyfish with stinging strings!
Don't use the intellect while awaring the jellyfish!
In a real journey to the inner body universe it is very important
that our awareness is kept in a totally pure
aha-state. It should not be contaminated by thoughts and
concepts. Thoughts will act
like a filter making it difficult
for the pure ahawareness to get in close encounter with
this energy-jellyfish in the stomach - and hence a weaker
amplification will take place.
But while reading right now even this weak amplification is useful
since it makes body and brain explore hand in hand.
The transforming of the Jellyfish into Lord Nataraj -
the dancing Shiva
So let us return our awareness without thoughts to the jellyfish.
Our goal is - described with words from a
Spielberg
movie - to get in close encounter of the third kind. If
we succeed, the energy-jellyfish immediately will respond by morphing,
transforming and moving in a more intense way. When amplified through
pure ahawareness it will
make an incredible tingling, nervous electrical energy pattern-dance. And what is even more important: At some point in this
dance these patterns will start to harmonize.
The harmonization point ... the energy-colors of the
jellyfish merge into
oneness
At a certain point in the awareness amplification process the
tingling, nervous electrical energy patterns will start to
harmonize. In the beginning of our journey the sensation of the
jellyfish was slightly unpleasant if not directly painful. What
here is defined as harmonization is a point where the journey
starts to become pleasant, even ecstatic. From this moment
onwards the sense-see-awareness of
the jellyfish is becoming more and more beautiful. It could be
compared to a snow
crystal, although it may still be morphing-moving. To aware the
Jellyfish becomes after the harmonization-point an almost
sensual joy.
Another interesting aspect
of the harmonized jellyfish is that the different aspects of the
tingling, nervous electrical energy patterns tends to
converge into oneness - pretty much the same way as a polyphonic
part of a music piece can be followed by a homophonic or unison part. All the
invisible colors of the dance turns into white light - (but only as
a metaphor since visions of white light is belonging to an
altogether different and "higher"
state of the process
of getting meditated).
The Inner body Spaceness - the glorious birth of Consciousness
When the jellyfish has become crystallized, the attention-energy
from the awareness will be reflected from the jellyfish back to
the source of the awareness. The crystallized jellyfish acts
like a mirror for the awareness.
What happens now can be compared to a sudden loud feed back
from a microphone-loudspeaker system: awareness feedbacks into
awareness. In this often quite sudden exponential happening - when
awareness awares awareness - consciousness is "created".
Consciousness is according to my experience-definition "feedbacked"
awareness.
The same thing basically happens when you in meditation ask the
question: Who am I?
This consciousness is an abstract entity and its description
easily attracts metaphors from quantum physics.
It is not
particular able to sense objects or able to be directed in time
and space. Actually it transcends time and objects and becomes
pure spaceness. Let us look at how that happens:
The first thing this new born consciousness is doing is to aware
the context of the jellyfish-dance. It is not so much concerned
with the sensation-part of the story. Rather it is seeing through
flowing out to the borders of
the energy-dance. And here it cannot find the borders of the dance
- it cannot find any end! It is one of the greatest assets of
consciousness that it cannot find endings. It cannot divide - on
the contrary it unites the divided parts into chains in and of
infinity.
And so it starts rejoicing as pure timeless
spaceness.
It is my intuitive feeling that consciousness even
transcends this state of spaceness, but since I have not
experienced it I cannot talk about it.
If you are blank after reading all these words maybe this little
exercise intuitively can put you back on the track. Ask
yourself from inside after awaring the tiny energy-tingling in your
feet: where do my inner feet stop and where does the floor
begin?
I am sure you inner experience at some point will be that
there are no borders.
And thus the dark Inner Body Universe is discovered. If this
journey is allowed to go to its natural destination, "You" as
pure consciousness will leave the realm of body-sensations.
In this
state you are not aware of "your" body! Or maybe one could say that "You" know that you don't have a body.
And thus the statement I am not the body is a statement
only the body can make.
This journey through the Inner Body Universe can only be made in
the
jellyfish-UFO.
It is a wonderful joke ...
Yes ... Your body is the UFO that brings you beyond the body...
Ascending from pure consciousness - the magic healing of the
emotional body.
Now let us for a moment return to the headline of this chapter:
Feel to heal - the importance of the ability to feel. And with
this headline we take a plunge back in the body. When this
consciousness returns to bodily sensations it discovers that the
body has been through a marvelous healing process. Actually this
healing of the body did not take place in the state of pure
consciousness. It happened in the process just before that:
at the harmonization point ...
the moment where the energy-colors of the
jellyfish merged into
oneness.
Here we discover the cleaning effect of an integral suffered meditation.
This wonderful healing touches you exactly where your emotional
energy body is connected with the physiological body. You will
feel refreshed, light, joyful. Whatever nervous imbalances you
have suffered due to stress, worry or other problems. After this
harmonization point
you will feel as your nervous system is completely reset to zero.
The implications of this are very important. It implicates that if
you make it a lifestyle to
aware the (often stinging) jellyfish, you will prevent you
nervous systems from damage and delay its aging process.
This is a hard proven fact in my own inner body-laboratory. I am
51 years old. My reaction time has in a test measured been
measured to be far below the average of people around 25.
Awareness and feeling sensations
awareness turns feeling-sensations into abstract "energy" - the
abstract energy is the fuel for consciousness
thus awareness should be rooted in a permanent inner body
feeling. All the mentioned sensations from physical pain, sex and
emotions can be used to manufacture this fuel.
When our feeling awareness contains these energies they are
transformed into consciousness.
feeling-seeing the dark universe inside the body.
Know Thyself
- Loose to win
Every time you get upset,
fearful, angry, sad you are presented with a gift. The
zen-buddhist say:
To win is to loose - to loose is to win...
Every external blow to your system is a blessing since it contains
an invitation for the brave to explore the inner-body-universe. To
know oneself
is
not an intellectual process - on the contrary - it is a
to know yourself is to know , be at home with , surrender to –
familiar with any inner-body sensation that is possible in your
bio-energy-system without making thought strategies to change and
manipulate them.
To surrender to your own inner-body-sensations – innerstand them is
to be a spiritual warrior.
Spontaneous
meditation rest behind the great wall of inner-body sensations -
pain.
Spontaneous in the absence of thoughts
When consciousness meets inner-body sensations without any
filters of conceptual understanding= thoughts – a spontaneous self
healing is taking place
Fear
& anger are friends
Fear has been
with us for millions of years. It is a natural and very good
feeling and taken in awareness is can be a great resource of
energy for the body mind and soul.
Don’t be afraid of being afraid – and also don’t search for fear
- just accept what ever comes in front of your nose. The stomach
is the reactor-centre of the fear to energy transformation.
We are meant to act on these emotions. Either attack or flee.
These emotions release energy
in the body to make us fit for survival. This energy can
through awareness be transformed into food or the consciousness
It is indeed a mystery. If it was not so serious in its
consequences I would laugh and call it the best joke I have ever
heard...
FEEL2HEAL
- HEAL2FEEL
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